Understanding Sibling

      The younger brother relished in experiences, slight and severe. The pain of the
knife cutting the soft tissues of his hand was severe and provided the most
exhilarating stimulus he had ever imagined. And although he was very
young when it happened, he recalled the sense of pleasure it gave to hold the sharpness of the steel, feeling it cut deeply into his flesh.
     Physical fighting gave him great satisfaction, also, whether he won or lost. Sweaty contact with opponents was the only human closeness he desired. The smell
of fear, his or theirs; the taste of blood, his or theirs were the primal rewards
he desired. There were no expectations other than hit and be hit. 
     This younger brother sought desperately to replace the caresses of someone from long ago. The feelings somehow got confused in the absence of gentle fingers playing along the side of his face; a rubbing of the stomach as he sat on the toilet, encouraging him to move his bowels. The fragrance of that person, sweet and gentle odors, as he leaned over, allowing her to continue the
caresses in firm yet gentle strokes down his spine, helping him along,
relieving the discomfort. Too suddenly the pleasant feelings stopped.
His father could not console him; pet him up and wipe away the tears as she had. Except for Cull, his brothers saw him as some pestering sibling who had to
be tolerated out of kinship.
    Cull understood his need to be touched in that certain way, and often
pounced on him for no reason, putting his head in a half-nelson, rubbing the
back of his neck raw, choking off his air supply until he almost passed out.
The feelings were often the sense of total release. 
     Conversely, he fascinated in ways of tormenting living creatures other than himself; for he did see himself as a creature, searching for and requiring
stimuli and response. Systematic torture was a daily event as insects, small
birds and neighborhood cats suffered under his needful cruelty. Capturing
the tiny lizard, which unfortunately, found its way into the kitchen, provided
a full hour's pleasure. Each tiny foot severed with a steak knife. Then off
came the tail, changing from leaf green to soot black, as the miniature
dinosaur opened its tiny mouth releasing silent screams at its abuser.
Cull often rescued many captives, releasing the prisoners into the
backyard and rewarding the executioner with sharp, deliberate slaps up side
the head. But, he never preached inhumanity or perversion. Cull
loved him totally, understanding his sickness, accepting and even
encouraging his need